This Is Why (Laurie Scrapbooks)
| This Is Why (Laurie Scrapbooks) |
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| Written by Liv Esteban | |||
| Monday, 11 May 2009 19:00 | |||
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As I grow older, I realize more and more how much of my grandmother the disease took away from me. When she was diagnosed, I was very young, not old enough to remember what she was like when she was completely disease-free. One of my most cherished possessions is a copy of the eulogy that my sister gave at my grandmother's funeral. Filled with stories of her teenage years, it was instrumental in my discovery of the feisty, rebellious side of my grandmother, a side of her I never would have known if her own sisters had not shared these stories about her before her funeral. Yet there is still a part of me that craves to know more about who she was. I wish that she had kept a journal, so that I could have discovered more of this amazing woman when her mind no longer permitted me to do so. There are so many things about her childhood and her life that I would have liked to know (What it was like to meet my grandfather for the first time? How did she feel when he asked her to marry him? How did she deal with the loss of her first child to leukemia?). To this day I mourn the loss of knowing more fully the only grandmother who had been an active part of my life. This need to know my grandmother is one of the motivating factors that has changed how I scrapbook and why. When I first started scrapbooking, I was just a little girl who enjoyed putting photos on construction paper with rubber cement (I know, I cringe at the thought too). But over the years, and especially now that I have a family of my own, I feel the need to leave my legacy, my story. I want my family to know who I am, what I love, and what I struggle with. I need my children to know that I am not perfect. That I struggled through my teenage years too. That I had my rebellious periods, but always came back to what I knew to be true. I want them to know of my unwavering faith in God, my belief in the eternal family, and how much I believe that little kindnesses make the world a better place. As much as I feel the need to do this for my family, I know I need to do this for myself as well. I know I am unique. I know I have a story to tell. I need to leave my mark that will affirm the amazing life I’ve led and continue to live. It may not be amazing by society’s standards. I may not have a big fancy house, and I may not have lots of money to buy all of the latest and greatest scrapbooking supplies. But I have everything I have ever wanted in my life. I have an amazing husband who is my best friend. He makes me laugh everyday. I have a sweet little boy who teaches me to be a better person. I have parents who have sacrificed to get me where I am today. I have a sister whom I have always looked up to (I used to follow her around when I was little and make her take me everywhere with her). I have a brother who has many talents and dares to dream big. I live a rich life because of them. Alzheimer’s disease may have robbed me of the chance to know my grandmother more fully, but it did not take away her ability to teach me through her shining example. I have never doubted her love or her strength. Her name was Joyce--I don’t know of anyone else who radiated joy like she did. Even when she was aware of what the disease was taking from her, she always showed an increase of love to those around her. These are things that I want my children to know about their great-grandmother. I also know that she would have wanted the legacy of her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren to continue beyond the grips of mortality. And so I scrapbook. To tell her story. To tell my story. And to make sure that her legacy lives on through me and my children’s stories. Trackback(0)
Comments (15)
 
I just lost an aunt to the same disease. I've spoken with my uncle over the past few years as she's battled the disease, and I've learned how difficult it is for the family. I hope you can find photos and memories of her from other family members to scrap and pass down to your children. In the end, it's all about family, sharing, and the memories created. And, how sad would it be if we weren't capturing those memories to be savored over and over and over again now and for future generations. Thanks for sharing with all of us.
1
May 12, 2009
You wrote your story so eloquently Laurie! Your grandmother would be so proud of you! It's wonderful how close you felt, and still feel, to her! She obviously was a very special person in your life who left you with many gifts! Your family is so lucky that you have already started telling your stories through scrapbooking for them to enjoy through the years! You're awesome GF and you have a heart of gold!
2
May 12, 2009
yes...... that is a wonderful story and so true to so many of us!!! I see my parents aging, and it hits way too close to my home! well said girlfriend. You are so wise beyond your years!
3
May 13, 2009
Laurie - I loved reading your story! Thanks for sharing it with us and for the wonderful reminder of how we must cherish and honor our lives, our families and our health. I really appreciate the opportunity to get to know you better through this beautiful story. Hugs, Janie
4
May 13, 2009
Beautifully put, Laurie. You are turning a tragedy into a benefit. Not knowing everything you want about your grandmother encourages you to scrap so others will know you. You are leaving behind a great legacy.
5
May 13, 2009
Thank you for sharing about your grandmother. My grandmother is still alive and physically doing well, but also has the disease.
6
May 13, 2009
Laurie,
This is so eloquently written. I am so sorry for your loss but am so glad that you have turned this tragedy into something beautiful for future generations. Thank you for the reminder to get to know more of my grandparents' stories before it is too late. Thank you for sharing! 7
May 13, 2009
It is good to be reminded that our lives will mean something to others even when we are gone. Thanks for sharing such a beautiful story.
8
May 13, 2009
I am taking care of my dad who has Alzheimer’s. It is a terrible disease. I never would have thought I wouldn't have had more time with him. He had just moved by us when this started. I never did get any stories written down which makes me immensely sad. It is a reminder to me as your grandmother's disease is to you to make sure our stories are told before they too are forgotten. Thanks for sharing!
9
May 13, 2009
What a beautiful written story Laurie.. not only do we crave knowing more about our grand mothers, but some of us like me, who emigrated to Australia 35 years ago, did'nt really know my parents, my mother passed away 5yrs ago and my father 10yrs ago, I only wished I had the courage to ask questions about them and their lives when they were still with us, especially about when they were younger.. your story has made me want to tell my grand daughter the stories of how my husband and I met and married and about having our daughter, her mum, and all the funny things in between.. thank you for sharing and inspiring...Janet
11
May 16, 2009
Laurie, my dear: Thank you so much for sharing your story. You are, as always, A.W.E.S.O.M.E., my friend! Your grandma is smiling at you--I'm sure of it.
 (((hugs)))13
May 19, 2009
Such an interesting story and so glad you shared it.
14
June 07, 2009
Thank you Laurie for writing what you did. Your very eloquent words reminded me that scrapbooking is not "just" a hobby that so many of us enjoy, but an historical record of moments of our lives and the lives of loved ones. What we document and record is a precious legacy that we leave for our children, grandchildren, and beyond.
15
January 02, 2013
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When I was a young girl, my grandmother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. Over the years I watched as her mind, strong and able once, slowly regressed till in her final years she could no longer speak coherent words or sentences.
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